Waking Up in Reno

I have just witnessed possibly the eighth Wonder of the Modern World (the other seven being, umm, I don’t know, I’d say one through six have something to do with beer, porn and the Internet, and let’s make the automated donut making machine number seven). The eighth addition to this fine and exalted list is none other than Robosaurus!

Oh boy, if I had one of these, you'd all pay bigtime..

If you’re unfamiliar with this contraption, or you have never seen the fine parody of it on The Simpsons, then all you need to do is picture a dinosaur made of metal, have it breathe fire, give it the ability to pick up a car in its claws and then chew on it with its sharpened hydraulic powered jaws. The mental image you now have is no where near as much fun as it would be to see this sucker in action in real life.

This fine metallic beast of fiery death and destruction is a feature of the U.S. Monster Truck racing circuit, and should be brought to this country immediately. It also just happens to be the destination of choice for the two couples in this little film which passed under the radar in this country, and probably everywhere else as well other than the States.

It’s not too hard to see why. First is the cast, bizarre/interesting as it is.

Billy Bob Thornton, Natasha Richardson, Charlize Theron and Patrick Swayze anyone?

Now what in the hell kind of casting decision is that?

They play a redneck dumbarse, sleazy goateed car dealer, scheming lying hussy and a depressed/repressed housewife. These descriptions of the characters are at times interchangeable amongst the cast, as the lot of them are a bunch of unfaithful insincere and only slightly well intentioned, dislikable losers.

"Yep, I did Ghost, and now I suck."

Swayze, well I’ve never been a fan, but his role somehow manages to trump up as an equal finish for probably the least detestable person here. His character is stupid is as stupid does, with a heart of gold - or more correctly a heart of beer. He’s married to ditzy hussy stick figure Charlize Theron. They’re trying to have a baby and use any opportunity to rut like hogs. She’s about as dumb as dogshit and played perfectly by Theron. Their best friends are Natasha Richardson and her husband Billy Bob Thornton. Richardson is a downhome sad repressed housewife, in the dumps because the spark has gone out of her marriage to Billy Bob, a sleazoid car dealer who hasn’t got a decent bone in his body and is a tightwad to boot. That he’s porking Theron as well is just icing on the cupcake o’ sleaze.

This happy, stupid, troubled bunch decide to take a trip across country to see the monster truck show, it being the primary form of cultural enlightenment in them thar parts of the backwoods of America, and along the way indulge in all the sort of expected hijinks that these movies get up to: drinking, gambling, fighting, rooting in the back seat, etc etc etc.

"Jezzus Billy Bob! Did you eat a dead cow or something? What the hell's wrong with your butt?"

The story goes nowhere for a long time, just presenting a series of vignettes, with the focus on Thornton establishing his wise-arse laconic attitude with a series of often amusing one liners. It’s when they arrive in Reno that the cat gets out of the bag that Theron and Thornton did the Mugambo Polka and naturally everyone starts yelling and screaming and abusing and cussing and insulting. At this juncture you have to expect that the characters will resolve to change themselves and demand some respect or apologise, so predictable is what this story serves up.

This offers up too few non-stereotypical histrionics to engage us in anything more than the most detached fashion. We watch and wait for some development, but it plays out as a meandering minor comedy without substance or originality with an ending which is too neat and unimaginative, much like the rest of the film.

Now, if they had Robosaurus sleep with Charlize Theron and eat the rest of the cast, that would have made for a great film.

WUIR is framed on this disc as a 1.78:1, 16:9 enhanced image, which is a slight change from the 1.85:1 popcorn and Coke enhanced theatrical aspect, but let’s keep that to ourselves, and the 87 minutes is easily shunted onto a single layer, pause-free DVD. For all I noticed it is practically blemish free, not a speck to be spotted, maybe a hair or bit of lint maybe at most on the print, but otherwise spotless. Sharpness is good, but detail for such a recent film is a little lower than expected, maybe a result of tightening it up to fit comfortably on a single layer, the 5.6mbps average bitrate not exactly pushing the limits. Colours are also a bit off, looking a little washy, and the odd splash of stronger hues have little impact.

A mostly front-heavy mix, with the centre channel carrying more than its 80% workload with bright vocals, but assisted with a happy chunk of stereo imaging from the funky music and effects. It has the slightest bit of push into the rears to liven some small periods up a bit, like the monster truck rally with the crowds and fire breathing truck, but that’s really the high point of the “5.1ness� in this mix.

The only bonus feature on this here disc is a theatrical trailer (which might make you surprised that it was actually released in theatres, but it was, and by all accounts it tanked). Other than that, there isn’t anything else to suffer through on this here DVD, and it’s not like that’s a bad thing in my eyes. I doubt anyone associated with this could have come up with much positive to say that wouldn’t come off sounding phoney. But then, that could be said about most DVDs I s’pose. Yep, I sure am in a negative mood tonight.

There are a few minor laughs and wry smirks to be had here and there, but that’s definitely about the sum total of the redeeming value of the story and acting.

The picture on the other hand is slightly more than agreeable and the audio from time to time has that spark that makes you wish this was a better film. But it isn’t, so forget it.

Rent some beers instead.