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  Directed by
  Starring
  Specs
  • Widescreen 1.78:1
  • 16:9 Enhanced
  Languages
  • English: Dolby Digital Stereo
  Subtitles
  • None
  Extras
  • Theatrical trailer
Flashback (Rental)
Universal/Universal . R4 . COLOR . 94 mins . MA15+ . PAL

  Feature
Contract

Flashback is the story of a little girl who was spared by a killer who slaughtered her family when she was young. Now that sheís older, sheís in therapy in an asylum, until her doctor tells her itís time to move on you stupid cow. Providing her with a job as a live-in French teacher to some idiot teenagers, it becomes apparent that the killer from all those years ago is back and coming for her again.

This is a really, really bad film. There is nothing good about it. It's nothing more than one part Scream, one part Psycho, one part Halloween and four parts dog turd. Seriously, I think it was accidentally released on DVD. Itís like someone felt sorry for someone else and said ďLook, we couldnít care less if you never actually get around to creating the DVD for this film, but if you are so bored one day that you are considering ways to kill yourself creatively with a roll-on deodorant, then have a whack at transferring this film to DVD instead. Or donít. Whatever you want. We donít care either way.Ē

That day came, and the DVD was made.

Then, as if the film wasnít bad enough to begin with, it gets worse when you listen to it the way it's presented on this disc. You donít have the option of listening in the original language, which is German or Chocolate Bavarian, or something, and reading subtitles. This DVD only has a really, really bad English dub. Let me repeat: itís a really, really bad dub.

For those who just tuned in: Itís a really, really, really bad dub.

I have a theory about the dub. I believe that one person did all the voices. It would explain some things, like why the voice acting is so uniformly bad with every single character. I also believe that this one person also dubbed the sound of a toothbrush in one early scene. Play it and youíll see what I mean. Actually, strike that, donít play it, just take my word for it. I donít want you wasting your money on this... now whatís the word Iím looking for... rubbish? Nah, too easy... Crap?... Nah, too simple... Unmitigated pile of festering horseshit with decomposing maggots coalescing into a gel of putrescent fungus of a film? Yeah, those are the words I was looking for.

The story, letís look closely at the story. No, letís not. The filming, oh boy I hope the filmmakers donít ever work again. They try to get creative, and meaningful, and have little shots of goats framed like it means something menacing or something, and these interesting camera shots that are a complete waste of effort, and done badly anyway. Also, this version may have been cut somewhere along the line for a ratings downgrade, but who knows, and frankly who cares?

Letís not talk about this film anymore. Itís bad enough that I had to waste time watching this instead of playing with my little boy.

  Video
  Audio
  Extras
Contract

Picture quality is as you would expect for a total dump of a film - very good. Clarity is nice, with good depth to the picture. There are some very nice scenic shots on a hillside and waterfall oozing little bits of detailed nature very well. Sharpness is just a little on the softer side of things. The aspect ratio is 1.78:1, and it has the obligatory 16:9 enhancement for all you who simply must watch rubbish in the highest possible quality. The shooting ratio seems to have been 2.35:1, but it was released in Germany on DVD at 1.85:1, so I'm not sure what happened to the left over .50:1. Hopefully they threw it in the bin. Other than that little discrepancy there's nothing negative to comment on, really, so at least the picture won't torture your eyeballs.

Unlike the damage the dubbing will cause your sanity...

Itís a bit hard to be objective about the audio because the voice dubbing is so damn annoying that you just want to hate it all. HATE IT ALL, I TELL YOU! Ahem, trying to keep a clear head about things, I can say it is clear, but too clear. The voices stand out head and shoulders above all else, making it sound like an unintentional Mystery Science Theater 3000 mockery. Being stereo, thereís nothing in the way of real sonic excitement to fill the room, not that the film calls for much anyhow. The original language mix might have gone some way to making the film watchable to some degree had it been included, but the powers that be have decided otherwise. Dunderheads.

Thank God all this has is a trailer as bonus material. Cleverly edited so that it avoids the cast speaking anything more than a grunt and so hiding the atrocious dubbing, the trailer is suitably ambiguous about the story content, a clear sign that this film should be avoided.


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  •   And I quote...
    "Stay right away from this DVD. Not only is the film rubbish, but the DVD is hardly worth the effort either with a shocking dub the only language choice. "
    - Vince Carrozza
      Review Equipment
    • DVD Player:
          Sony DVP-525
    • TV:
          Sony 68cm
    • Receiver:
          Sony STR-DB1070
    • Speakers:
          Wharfedale s500
    • Centre Speaker:
          Polk Audio CS245
    • Surrounds:
          Wharfedale WH-2
    • Subwoofer:
          DB Dynamics TITAN
    • Audio Cables:
          Standard Optical
    • Video Cables:
          standard s-video
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