If farting, crapping, masturbation, boobs, bums and balls are your idea of what makes a comedy (and hey, let’s face it, don’t they for us all? What the hell did Shakespeare know? Much Ado About Nothing needed more diarrhoea gags) then Flixmix – Loads O’ Comedy, or as I like to call it, Shitmix - Loads O’ Poo, is the DVD for you.
Taking the successful formula that brought us Ultimate Fights and Boogeymen (well, I’m guessing that it was a successful formula, but I also recall reading somewhere that some guys went bankrupt making this crap) the makers have spliced together a collection of the funniest moments in 5,000 years of movie history (as long as they involve someone farting, jerking off or taking a dump, that is).
Unfortunately, they’ve overlooked the classic “Tom Hanks uses dried poo for bullets” scene from Saving Private Ryan, the hilarious “Anne Frank eats baked beans and nearly gives away her secret location to the Germans” scene from The Diary of Anne Frank, the immortal “They shall never take our flatulence!” moment from Mel Gibson in Braveheart or finally the Knight challenging Death to a pissing contest in The Seventh Seal.
Instead, we get a load of scenes (or is that a load of bollocks?) from American Pie 1 & 2, Frat King, Liar Liar, Animal House, Love Stinks, The Nutty Professor, Dumb and Dumber, Billy Madison, Scary Movie, Austin Powers 1 & 2, Road Trip, Kentucky Fried Movie, Booty Call, The Meaning of Life, Meet the Parents, Joe Dirt, The Animal, Amazon Women on the Moon and Happy Gilmore.
I’m not sure what kind of replay value this will have. It’s only 52 minutes long, some of the scenes aren’t all that funny, and taken out of their films they lose a little of their impact. Don’t get me wrong, there are some great scenes that don’t involve body parts or bodily functions, but comedy is a very subjective thing so what floats my boat might not float yours, so to speak.
All the footage sourced is panned and scanned to a 4:3 format and looks less than the typically high quality of the actual DVDs where available. Some are a little darker than usual as well, but most are reasonably clear, the more recent titles lifting the grade overall. Who cares? You're watching clips of people jerking off and taking a turd, so does it really matter if the picture isn't spot on?
There are two options for audio, a “processed” 5.1 mix (their words) or a surround mix. They both sound essentially the same, with even the 5.1 version not doing anything that makes the extra mixing effort sound like it was worth it. Assuming that any effort actually went into it at all. What counts is that they are all clear enough to make out every BLLLRRZZZT and FFFRRRRPHHHUPT. Which you can. Your parents/partners/flatmates will be proud of your choice of viweing material when they hear you playing this one loud at night.
Without the extras offered here, it would be hard to recommend this DVD. The selection nudges the “do I or don’t I?” renting factor only just slightly into the “rent it” court, if you’re desperate for something to watch, and have no life, that is.
An on-screen subtitle system that continually displays info about the film showing, or general trivia regarding the theme of the clip, i.e. masturbation facts etc etc. Believe it or not, there’s actually some interesting content in here, and most of it seems fairly factual. But then again, what the hell would I know about how many people in American claim to suffer from the runs in any given week?
Loads O’ Outtakes
From memory, I think that many of these outtakes are taken from the respective DVD releases, so I doubt there’s anything undiscovered hidden in here, not that there are that many anyhoo.
The Art of Fart
Yep, when you get right down to it, the very fabric of modern cinema is based around the sound design of fart effects. I’m sure that somewhere in his past, even Gary Rydstrom has a few fart effects he had created for little know films. I’ve heard a rumour that if you listen really carefully to the right front speaker during the Ice-Age excavation sequence in A.I. you can hear Haley Joel Osment let one rip. This featurette goes into detail about how some fart sounds are created for movies. Use this knowledge carefully, my children.
Commentary – Adam Carolla & Jimmy Kimmel from The Man Show (whatever the hell that is).
When you’ve played through the DVD normally once, stick this commentary on, and the Flixfacts subtitles at the same time, and you’ll get an easy second run out of it. Their comments are sometimes funnier than the clips they’re watching, and the discussion can get a little blue. But then again, it’s not like you’re a Catholic nun if you’ve rented this DVD, is it? But if you’re a nun and you are watching this DVD, you should be f*cking ashamed of yourself! You’re gonna burn in Hell, baby!
Sick ‘n’ Silly Soundboard
20 point and click effects you can play on your DVD player, and even a few more if you use a PC DVD-ROM. Entertain your guests with rib ticklers such as: Show Me Your Nuts, Rippin’ Proud, Better Get a Bucket, and many many more. Let this feature uncover the true all-powerful potential of DVD technology. Hang on, I gotta drop one right now myself… who needs a sound effect when you can get the same result with too many cheeseburgers?
Pick your Poison Game
Five players each select one of the icons on screen, and utilising the “white rabbit” technology at its best, when the clips play and the icon appears onscreen, you do a predetermined action, such as smack the person next to you in the face, or take a dump on their head, or strangle their cat. Whatever you want, it’s your game, be creative!
Name That Frame Game
You’ve seen it before on the previous DVDs. A random movie frame appears onscreen from one of the films featured, and you have to guess which one it is. Get it right and be rewarded with the sound of a woman having an orgasm (I reckon she’s faking it), get it wrong and you’ll hear some guy chuck his guts big time. A classy affair.
In here you get trailers for other Flixmix titles Boogeymen and Ultimate Fights, plus further trailers for most of the films feature on this DVD.
PC DVD-ROM Stuff
Shove this disc in your PC (if you have a DVD-ROM drive, that is) and you can access some extra sound effects with the added ability to program a whole bunch of them together which you can then play back as one long effect. That is seriously pretty f*cking dumb, really, when you think about it. I mean, some guy sitting in a DVD authoring joint said to the client “Hey, how cool would it be if you could select a whole bunch of different pooing effects to play back in one long take?! It’ll only cost ya $100 per hour for me to write the code.”
There’s also a slot machine type game, which if you get the right matching combination reveals the exact number of people who have committed suicide in the toilets at Crown Casino after losing their life savings. Just kidding, it supposedly reveals some hidden clips, but I couldn’t be stuffed playing it long enough to find out if this is true or not. Tell you what, if you rent/buy this DVD, find out for me, and if you email me with the details, I’ll add your name into this review. Go on! If you want five seconds of fame you have to earn it, you lazy shit.
Check our Easter Egg Department to find out how to reveal this little bonus.