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DVD eCards

Here are the current screen captures available at DVD Net. Listed under each movie is a short blurb describing the image. Once you have selected an image you like, send the screen capture as a DVD eCard to a friend on the net by clicking on the link at the top of the viewing page and then filling in the simple form. Enjoy

24 - Season Two
 1 A title that even a breathalyser can display.
 2 "Kim, I'm... behind you! Behind you!"
 3 Kate Warner (Sarah Wynter) executes her first Shocked Expression for the season.
 4 David Palmer (Dennis Haysbert) and assistant Lynne Kresge (Michelle Forbes) do what they do best - look very, very worried.
 5 Seasoned 24 viewers will recognise the look on Kim Bauer's face. Uh-oh.

25th Hour
 1 Interrogation in the 21st century: the entire ROOM is the light bulb.
 2 "Just as well this is a widescreen film, or I'd be drinking alone..."
 3 Monty makes sure he's not accidentally turned up at a Blue Light Disco.
 4 Jacob, Naturelle and Frank prepare to farewell Monty.
 5 Mary (Anna Paquin) has a moment of rare clarity.

8 Women
 1 Sisters in arms.

A Bronx Tale
 1 The mob bought their suits at a Roger David "Buy 1 Get 2 Free Sale"
 2 "C'mere and gimme a kiss and I'll give ya a lovely cabbage."

A Cinderella Story
 1 Tween fairytale
 2 Talent challenged Hilary Duff
 3 Cotton Candylicious menu

A Night At The Roxbury
 1 Doug and Steve Butabi; In search of Zorro?
 2 You want a piece of this? How about this?

Absolutely Fabulous - Series 5
 1 Eddy Eddy Eddy!
 2 In with anger, out with love!
 3 Patsy darling, we found Serge.

Adaptation
 1 This time for sure...
 2 I'm seeing double - FOUR Nic Cages!
 3 All I want for Christmas...
 4 Birds do it, bees do it...
 5 Coochie-coochie-coo!

AFL Collingwood - Wall to Wall
 1 Into battle
 2 The late and great Darren Milane.
 3 Back to back Copeland Trophy winner Paul Licuria.
 4 ROCCAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!
 5 Tha Magic Man - Peter Daicos.

AFL St. Kilda - Wall to Wall
 1 You'll believe a man can fly.
 2 When men were men, and shorts were very, very tight.

Alias - The Complete First Sea...
 1 Sydney Bristow, expert at blending undetectably into the background. Usually.
 2 A rarely-scene shot from the unreleased "Where's Sydney?" book.

Alien Quadrilogy dts
 1 Deleted outtake
 2 Original concept art
 3 Spin off sequel: Aliens Vs Planet of the Apes
 4 Spin off Special: A Very Alien Christmas

Alien vs. Predator dts
 1 This is certainly not Disney on Ice.
 2 Ice to see you.
 3 Oh, that's nice and warm!!!
 4 So many predators, so little time.
 5 Come fly with me, let's fly, let's fly away
 6 Graduation of snow mobile licensing at the RTA.

Aliens: CE
 1 Unused Concept Art for Newt...
 2 Unused Concept Art for the Aliens...
 3 Unused Concept Art for the Alien Queen...

Ally McBeal - Season 1: Part 1
 1 Shoot that poison arrow through my heart.
 2 The face bra
 3 Billy & Richard hard at work
 4 She’s electrifying!
 5 Waif, armed & dangerous.

Ally McBeal - Season 2: Part 1
 1 He's Baaaaack
 2 Sub-zero Ally
 3 Ally McBeal, the incredible shrinking woman
 4 I've fallen and I can't get up
 5 The ultimate My Little Pony
 6 Bobblehead Ally

Amazon Women on the Moon
 1 Don gets down...
 2 That guy on the left is a dick...

American Pie - CE
 1 Three boys, the Internet and a hot babe onscreen.
 2 Oz sings to Stifler - It's amazing what a woman can do to a guy.
 3 "Like warm apple pie" - Oz.
 4 Finch, not one to use public toilets, get's some laxative encouragement.
 5 You can always rely on magazines to learn about the birds and the bees.

Anacondas - The Hunt For The B...
 1 You sure this is sanitary?
 2 Anacondas - Revenge of the crocodile hunter.
 3 Are you sure you're wearing Lynx Africa.
 4 Help, bee bit my wip, all swowwen.
 5 Welcome to the jungle.
 6 Getting ready to boogie.

Anatomie 2
 1 The first cut is the deepest.
 2 Building the perfect beast.
 3 Heroin chic. Sid and Nancy.
 4 Dr. Josef Mengele's love child.
 5 I don't like the drugs, but the drugs like me.
 6 Post mortem. Getting into the guts of the main menu.

Angel Heart
 1 Muggers start young in the deep south.
 2 "Are you staring at my nipples?"
 3 Harry decided to pass on the gumbo.

Anger Management
 1 Who does number two work for?
 2 Ooh! What a big, fuzzy teddy bear!
 3 Whaddya mean it was OUT?
 4 One mother of a curling wand...
 5 From New York mayor to just one of the crowd...

Arrested Development - Season ...
 1 The cast of the best show on TV.
 2 Jason Bateman
 3 Happy Family. NOT!
 4 Yoga is safer with a helmet!
 5 '80s headbands are sooo back. Sorta!
 6 Arrested Development Menu

Astro Boy Deluxe Collection Ti...
 1 Dr Elefun and Astros sister Uran
 2 Astro with Mum and Dad
 3 Why we recycle Coca Cola cans.
 4 Where would you be without your Bruton 33?
 5 Time for some fisticuffs.
 6 Everyone needs a shiny Atlas.

Austin Powers - SE
 1 Frozen for 30 years, Austin Powers will return.
 2 Well you shake it to the left...
 3 Allow myself to introduce ... myself.
 4 1 million dollars. whahahahahaha
 5 The Fembots make their presence felt.

Baby Juice Express
 1 and the odd one out is...
 2 Did you just fill that? You wanker!

Bad Eggs
 1 PHWOAR! Hornbag alert...
 2 MMMmmm... beige.
 3 The requisite fart joke...
 4 And I thought my flat had high ceilings...
 5 Shit. I'm stuck in a f*ckin' Homicide homage...
 6 Playing the Mick Chick again. Oh joy.

Bad Santa
 1 Quentin Tarantino presents, Bad Santa!
 2 Midget boxing!
 3 Santa on the edge of a crisis!
 4 Mad Mike from Pimp My Ride
 5 Lucky Jason Lee, of Mallrats, isn’t watching...

Ballistic - Ecks vs Sever
 1 Can someone please tell me what this thing is and why it's in this film?
 2 Well, you see doc, it kinda curves to the left, you know what I mean?

Basil Brush - Unleashed
 1 I feel so trapped!

Battle Of The Planets - Collec...
 1 The G-Force Team.
 2 Transmute!
 3 The mighty Phoenix arrives!
 4 Zoltar plots his evil take-over.
 5 Some of the wonderful Artwork.

Bean: The Movie
 1 A face only a mother could love.
 2 Please to meet you...
 3 Greetings from the UK

Before Sunrise
 1 Celine (Julie Delpy) on a life-changing train trip.
 2 Jesse (Ethan Hawke) and Celine get to know each other on a Viennese tram.
 3 Vienna obviously doesn't go for dark, dank alleyways...
 4 Last-minute meditation.

Below
 1 The opening titles - no expense spared.
 2 Freshly rescued, Claire unleashes her patented Nicole Kidman Look.
 3 "Above you! Above you!!"
 4 Under attack, the only thing to do is.... hide!
 5 Something red and spooky this way comes...
 6 A watery grave... but for whom?

Berserk 2 - Immortal Soldier
 1 Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!

Beyond Borders
 1 You ordered a banana sir?
 2 Welcome to Dust-r-us.
 3 My wips are fweezing.
 4 Hurry up and take the photo. It's cold.

Big Fish: CE
 1 Not the same Spectre as last time...
 2 I hope he's not allergic...
 3 Time stands still
 4 Big Fish leaps off the screen with absolute richness - a taste of what's to come.
 5 Pure Burton genius

Billy Connolly - Bites Yer Bum...
 1 Please God, help me remember the punchline."
 2 "Now was it E, A then D, or E, D then A? Damn!"

Birthday Boy
 1 Listen to the track.
 2 Fire in the hole!
 3 A discovery.

Blade - Trinity dts
 1 Blade struts his stuff
 2 Just dropping in
 3 Can I get some buttons here?
 4 Another one bites the dust
 5 What do you mean you didn't like Van Wilder?

Bless This House - Series 1 Pa...
 1 the good old ad caps

Blue Crush (2002)
 1 Going that way. Really fast.
 2 The sign says it all. Waves hurt.
 3 "...and I still write my name on my wave."
 4 Layne Beachley practices for Academy Awards night.
 5 Behind you! Behind you!!!!

Born Free
 1 Cute

Boys from the Blackstuff
 1 Look at what that guy over there is wearing!

Breakdown
 1 Pick the yuppy 4x4.
 2 Help me honey, this bonnet is getting heavy.
 3 Hmm, hard to tell, always in motion is the future.
 4 Freeway sure is busy this morning.
 5 Bunji rope? What do you mean Bunji rope?

Bridget Jones 2 - The Edge Of ...
 1 The front is day.
 2 Is there ever too much Hugh Grant? Nein!!!
 3 Twinkle twinkle little star, hope I wore a decent bra.
 4 Their first child was name Hugh Jass.
 5 Charlies best-be-forgotten Angels.
 6 The purple people eaters - it's subliminal.

Cabin Fever
 1 "Damn. The prom is tomorrow. I'll never fix my hair in time."
 2 "So. Is that your car all covered in blood and shit? yeah? Alright then. Cool."
 3 "Hi. I live in this review. Wanna smell my shoes?"
 4 Ever wondered how the 'Philips Head' screw driver got its name? Ask Philip.

Car Wash
 1 Why we should all forget the '70s ever existed...

Carry on Nurse
 1 Nudge, nudge, wink, wink, fnarr-fnarr, ooh-err crikey missus, etc.

Carry on Sergeant
 1 Britain's front line of defence. It's amazing they won the war, really.
 2 Training for the old "smash your nuts on the enemy's neck" trick.

Cast Away (Rental)
 1 Here's one we prepared earlier
 2 The traffic outside was unbearable.

Catch Me if You Can (Rental) dts
 1 It's a dirty job but someone's gotta do it...
 2 Oh the humanity!

Cecil B. Demented
 1 Where's Antonio when you need him?
 2 More fun than a livestock mutilation!

Chaka Khan - Live at Roxy Thea...
 1 Is my hair too big?

Charlie's Angels - Full Thrott...
 1 Strutting their stuff, and they know that "You can't touch this!"
 2 Sharp, sexy and smashed.
 3 Taking full "advantage" of the widescreen frame...
 4 C'mon Joey, if you don't help the lady out, Chandler will.
 5 An African-American Bosley? Somehow it works...
 6 Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle - they're gonna blow you away!

Child's Play 2
 1 "Don't f#@k with the Chuck."

City By the Sea
 1 Bright lights, big city, not exactly by the sea.
 2 Gina (Eliza Dushku) listens to Joey make his excuses.
 3 Nothing worse than waking up to find a Spyder on your bed.
 4 Vincent (De Niro) realises things just got much, much worse...

Closer
 1 Art these days... with its mind control powers!
 2 "Oh, my. That pink hair does wonders for your complexion!"
 3 - "You okey?" - "Oh, jolly. Just bit my lip is all."
 4 Double the Natalie Portman; double the fun!
 5 Jude Law sparks a striking resemblance to none other than our favourite chef, Jamie Oliver!

Coffee Crazy: SE
 1 Loopy Luigi Lupi and his latté art.
 2 The worlds worst coffee?

Cool Hand Luke
 1 What we've got here... is failure to communicate!

Corvette - America's First Spo...
 1 MMMmmm, shiny!

Courage Under Fire
 1 Lou Diamond Phillips has a secret
 2 Matt Damon has an even bigger secret
 3 Meg Ryan is in deep trouble
 4 Denzel Washington has to find out the hard truth.

Crackerjack
 1 Like a tiger!
 2 The boys are back in town...
 3 The buns are better at Cracker Jacks...
 4 A Crackerjack menu...

Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
 1 Traffic is bad, let's take the river road.
 2 skim rocks? Skim ourselves instead.
 3 This coffee tastes like mud! Serenity now!
 4 Damn those beans. Potent.
 5 Hoowee!!! Who's bean eating beans out on the lake.

Cyndi Lauper - 12 Deadly Cyns....
 1 AGH! Cartman in the buff!
 2 Punkish sneer? Check...

Dante's Peak: SE dts
 1 Dirty water, shaken not stirred, naturally
 2 Hmm, just as I suspected, a rock! That evil Dr. Erupto must be behind this!

Dawn of the Dead - DC (2004)
 1 Someone wasn't happy they missed breakfast.
 2 The school bus of the apocalypse.
 3 "Let's get down with the sickness."
 4 Serious end-of-days zombie action!
 5 A serious blood-bath.

Death to Smoochy
 1 Robin Williams dresses down for a change...
 2 'C' is for 'co...', oh.
 3 Catherine Keener lets Smoochy's critics know what she thinks of their opinions...
 4 Not purple, fuschia - really...
 5 Dickhead meets smackheads...

Deep Blue Sea
 1 Samuel L. Jackson
 2 Saffron Burrows as the mad scientist.
 3 Jaws, with a smarter brain.

Die Another Day: SE dts
 1 Sorry old chap, but I'm not going anywhere without Wilson...
 2 Ice to see you, swanna bonk?
 3 Torvill & Dean get with the Noughties...
 4 Pah, it's been done...
 5 The menu, shaken not stirred - of course.

Dinosaur
 1 Come with me if you want to live.
 2 Realistic looking fur - finally.
 3 Do you come here often
 4 Hello there Mr Raptor

Disco Never Looked So Good
 1 Collette, now appearing behind a checkout near you.

Doctor Who - The Aztecs
 1 "Don't look now, but I think there's a dead chicken in your hair."

Doctor Who - The Talons of Wen...
 1 "Elementary my dear...Leela?"
 2 "I think I'll have the sweet and sour rodent and a large fried rice, thanks."
 3 "I don't know about you, but I'll be having words with my stylist."

Dog Soldiers
 1 "Oi, lads, anyone for sausages?"
 2 "Hi, I'm Frank, and behind me is Steve. We like horse-riding, rollerblading, dancing, and ripping peoples heads off. Call us now."

Doing Hard Time
 1 The Insta-Photo-Mater 5000.
 2 48 hours 24 style.
 3 Woah!! It's one of those behind-you mirrors.
 4 I smell a fugazi!
 5 I once caught a fish THIS BIG!!!
 6 Whatya mean fiddy cent gap?

Donnie Darko
 1 The experience begins...
 2 Donnie at the world's most depressing bus stop.
 3 The grass may be green, but the mood is dark...
 4 Drew Barrymore as teacher Karen Pomeroy.
 5 Donnie walks out of the strangest double bill in town.
 6 "I can see Mt Doom from here..."

Double Team
 1 Van Damme's head injuries were not a blessing to his acting.
 2 The future is so dull yet I still wear shades.
 3 Help, I'm stuck in the doorway.
 4 The crispness of dvd really shines...
 5 Mickey Rourke all beefed up.

Down With Love (Rental)
 1 Hitting the hip, cool, far-out, groovy and boss places...
 2 Now where would we be if not for yellow lines?

Dragons Lair (Interactive Vide...
 1 The haunted castle sits lonely on the hill.
 2 Dirk the Daring to the rescue.
 3 Fancy a game of marbles?
 4 Jedi Dirk and his lightsaber.

Drumline
 1 Whip it! Whip it good!
 2 And we have lift off!
 3 Pretty simple to guess which stick goes where...

DVD Fireplace
 1 Just add marshmallows

Earth Vs The Flying Saucers
 1 Major Johnson let one rip after a spicy Indian curry with devastating results.
 2 This is Christine Spiteri reporting for Nightline.
 3 Colonel Adams loved to impersonate a chocolate Easter bunny with things got tense.
 4 The Army unveils its high tech table soccer training facility.

Ed Wood: SE
 1 Does my butt look big in this?
 2 Pull the string!
 3 Ed Wood - the menu...

Eddie Izzard - Dress to Kill
 1 Too much make up?

Elephant
 1 "Why are you crying?"
 2 "I didn't know John had a dog!"
 3 "Ohh... take a picture of me!"
 4 ...background Beethoven...
 5 "Oh, no no. I don't do outdoor nudity."

Empires - Egypt's Golden Empir...
 1 Oh, yes, I know this one...they're the, umm...oh, damn.

Empires - Japan: Memoirs of a ...
 1 3 Brm, 2 Bath. Double garage. First to see will buy.
 2 Everyone pitched in to help find Yukio's contact lens

Empires - The Roman Empire
 1 "Hey Biggus, who's this Russell Crowe fellow then?"
 2 "I hate camping!"

Enter the Dragon
 1 Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
 2 Do you hear what he said about your fro bro?
 3 Jackie Chan. The 2 second stooge.
 4 Wheel of Fortune Cookie!

Erasure - Hits! The Videos
 1 Set 'em up, bartender!
 2 A rare glimpse of Vince Clarke's audition for the lead in Shrek - the Musical.

Eric Clapton - Unplugged
 1 A wide shot of the stage.
 2 Eric Clapton, up close and digital.
 3 Ting on the triangle.

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotle... dts
 1 Ice™ - bringing people together since creation.
 2 You're the doc Doc.
 3 Wearing lab coats ensures Lacuna workers aren't accidently covered in brains.
 4 Can't caption... so beautiful!
 5 Carrey preparing for his role in A Clockwork Orange: The Remake.
 6 "...Meet me in Montauk..."

Evolution
 1 The Butt Files: The Cheeks are out there.
 2 Beware of the Dog.
 3 The Three Amigos.

Family Guy - Season One
 1 The gang's all here...
 2 Seriously, who could resist?
 3 Stewie does his block...
 4 Shaken, not stirred - naturally.
 5 Getting down with the Griffins...

Far From Heaven
 1 Adopting the stylistic look of the 1950s
 2 A stinker about to happen in the bathroom...
 3 You mean I'm pregnant?
 4 Far From Heaven

Faust
 1 Amy Flower liked to make a grand entrance to the DVDnet office each morning.
 2 This is me when I've finished writing a review.

Femme Fatale
 1 "Give me the other half of my headphones or I'll reformat your mouth in 16:9"
 2 Running away, done the ultra-stylish French way.
 3 "If only I could find a sex shop..."
 4 "Glurbbble blllb glug splubbl."
 5 Shadow boxing as entertainment.
 6 "Err, Laure - please tell me I didn't forget something when I got changed..."

Final Destination 2 dts
 1 Log, log, log - it's big, it's heavy, it's wood.
 2 Why 25" subwoofers in cars are a bad idea.
 3 Never entrust your car to Rammstein Transport Inc.
 4 A brave attempt to get up to page 1470 of the new Stephen King novel before bedtime.
 5 "Am I making myself CLEAR?? Oh, hang on, I am Clear."
 6 This in-car drinking fountain perhaps needs a little refinement.

Finding Nemo dts
 1 They call him Bruce...
 2 Ooh, pretty!
 3 Mine!
 4 I have soiled myself... how embarrassing.
 5 Righteous!
 6 Aah ooh wah hee ha ho ho ho!

Fleetwood Mac-Rumours
 1 I could have sworn this mic was up higher a minute ago.
 2 No comment.
 3 I made this guitar our of old floor boards.
 4 "Woman brain, small like chicken".

Freddy vs. Jason
 1 I'm like really scared ok!
 2 The chicks dig me!
 3 BOO!

Frida (Rental)
 1 Kahlo's "The Broken Column" jumps to life...
 2 There's a bit of Tim Burton's The Nightmare Before Christmas in everyone...
 3 Let Technicolour rule!
 4 Geoffrey Rush as controversial Trotsky
 5 The Kahlo look-a-like - no one else coulda done it!
 6 The doorway to Frida's life

Friends - The Complete Season ...
 1 The famous title for the first time.
 2 The soggy six.

Friends - The Complete Season ...
 1 Mind your hand there Jen!
 2 Oops!

Full Frontal
 1 She's faking it - as if you can sleep on a plane!
 2 Uh, not that type of massage...
 3 Pippy Longstocking 25 years later...
 4 "I spit on your film!"

Futurama Season 3
 1 So THAT's what it was!
 2 Just another generic crustacean...
 3 Whoa, check out the cans!
 4 Two eyes? Whoa, what a freak!
 5 Wucka wucka wucka wucka...
 6 Dance puny humans, or I will destroy you!

Gangs of New York dts
 1 Bill the Butcher leads his gang into battle.
 2 Our first glimpse of Jenny, through a Scorsese-friendly shattered blue glass window.
 3 Amsterdam shows cinematographer Michael Ballhaus how subtle he is at the spying game.
 4 "Alright, who threw that tomato? I'll 'ave ya."
 5 "You see, Jenny? Open fireplaces are bad for the... I think I'll call it the Ozone Layer."
 6

Garfield - The Movie
 1 i feel like pizza tonight, like pizza tonight.
 2 easy back there.
 3 the strut.
 4 These things will never sell.
 5 consequences of a cat-apult.

George & Mildred - Complete Se...
 1 "Your wig's on crooked."

Gettin' Square: CE
 1 Do yous likes me mullet?
 2 Great name for a boat!
 3 We'll call him Bob!

Ghostbusters - CE
 1 Do not talk in the Library
 2 The Stay Puft Marshmallow man
 3 Rick Moranis is the Key Master
 4 We came, we saw, we kicked dvd ass.

Gilda
 1 It's called the wonder woman. Hands out far and spin.
 2 This is my boomstick.

Glam Rock - The DVD dts
 1 Bass chicks ROOL!
 2 It's Keith Partridge - SWOON!
 3 From crayons to perfume to...

Gods and Generals
 1 "The first rule of Fight Club is never speaketh about Fight Club."
 2 "Rough night? I use Libra Tampons. They have wings or something."
 3 "Hey! Someone invented a Porta-Loo!"

Goodbye Lenin!
 1 Alex shooting his pilot for the German edition of 'A Current Affair'.
 2 Half-statue of Vladimir Lenin floating past your window: $500,000
 3 The realisation that communism isn't all its cracked up to be: Priceless
 4 Sunset seems to always herald a time of reflection... Hmmm...

Gothika
 1 Robert Downey Jr. doing his Al Pacino face.
 2 Penelope Cruz; Parked car chaser.
 3 Indiana Berry and the Raiders of the Lost Knife!

Gravion - Volume 1
 1 STATUS CLITICAL!!!
 2 BOUS, GROUSE!
 3 Hey, who died?
 4 Never let your hand towel touch water, good advice.
 5 More BOUS than you can poke a stick at.

Grinspoon - 23 Hours of Waitin...
 1 The very cool menu.
 2 Rockin' out the Enmore Theatre.

Gungrave - Vol. 1: Beyond The ... dts
 1 Taken down execution style...
 2 "People look up. Things fall down. And when it rains, it pours."
 3 That gun is telling me this guy means trouble.
 4 It's hard to think that five minutes ago they were both riddled with bullets, lying on a sidewalk...

Happy Gilmore
 1 Happy GIlmore polishes up his singing before the Wedding Singer
 2 Carl Weathers as a retired boxer/golfer.
 3 Jaws - Either has metal in his teeth or metal in his head.
 4 Shooter and Happy square off

Harry Potter and the Chamber o...
 1 Ooh, it's E.T.! Or is it Yoda? Umm, Gandhi?
 2 Eat your heart out George Jetson!
 3 A little light reading...
 4 Harry Potter and the Menu of Secrets

Harvard Man
 1 ...and I want a 'Flower Power' Barbie, and a little pink Beetle Bug for her to drive around in... and, and, and a pony, and...

Heart - Alive in Seattle dts
 1 Looking good.
 2 Who said Roseanne can't sing?

Heaven
 1 Unspoken communication.
 2 Philippa (Cate Blanchett) evades capture.
 3 A moment of understanding.

Heavy Metal - CE
 1 Wipe off 5!
 2 Hey, whizz fizz!
 3 Umm!

Hellboy - The DC
 1 Hey! Hey! They're Playing our Song!
 2 Ready for a Fight: Kroenen the Clockwork Villain
 3 Beauty and the Beast
 4 Rasputin and his Nazi Gang Set their Trap.
 5 Professor Broom and Abe Sapien

History of Football - The Beau...
 1 Things go better with Coke!

Hook - CE
 1 Hook by name, Hook by reputation
 2 Julia Roberts plays tiny Tinkerbell

Hulk dts
 1 "Hi. My name's Bruce Banner and I'm a psycopath..."
 2 But I like's a pounding ya'll.
 3 You talkin to me?
 4 The paparatzi was Hulk's constant companion.
 5 "Puny human..."
 6 I know there's a transformer in here somewhere...

I Heart Huckabees
 1 Ah! My beautiful face!
 2 A tree-planting ceremony in the middle of a carpark will always turn heads...
 3 Don't worry, there's no sugar!!!
 4 "Being a model can be so... emotional!"
 5 Oh I'm a firefighter on a bicycle!

ICC World Cup Cricket 2003 - O...
 1 Gilchrist's levitation act is really coming along.
 2 "Hey, so glad you could make it."
 3 The team that swept all before them...and then some.

Identity
 1 "Does anyone know the way to the Scrubs set?"
 2 "Alas, poor Yorick! Oh, hang on, wrong script... Alas, poor Nokia..."
 3 "...and when I wiggle my fingers like this, you can only see it in the widescreen version..."
 4 Amanda Peet finally reaches THAT note in Nessun Dorma.
 5 "Ginny, if our relationship wasn't in Panavision I'd feel a lot closer to you right now."
 6 "Meeting adjourned."

Illuminations - The Tea Party ... dts
 1 "Jim Morrison? Never heard of him..."
 2 "Look, aren't we carrying this crucifixion business too far...?"
 3 A quiet moment of reflection.

Immortal Beloved
 1 Beethoven assumes Bust Pose #4
 2 One of Beethoven's admirers... but is she his Immortal Beloved?
 3 Beethoven tries out the first Piano Walkman.

Insomnia (2002) (Rental)
 1 "Exactly how long since you got some sleep, Al?"

Intolerable Cruelty dts
 1 Yes, he brusha brusha brushas...
 2 The moment Miles' eyes popped...
 3 Portrait of an ass nailer.
 4 Lust in an elevator...

Jack & Sarah
 1 The penny drops...

Jerry Lee Lewis - and Friends
 1 Yes, they were dancing in the street.
 2 Some critics accused him of playing out of his arse.

Jerry Maguire: CE
 1 The main menu (animated fish optional)
 2 Renee Zellweger as Dorothy.
 3 "Our movie is thiiiiis wide!"
 4 "No! NO!!! Not the Dolby 'City' trailer again!!"

Joe's Apartment
 1 Welcome to New York!
 2 Careful, it's ruffled!
 3 Oh no, the cockroaches are revolting...
 4 A match made in...

Johnny English dts
 1 Ah, so that's where my career went...
 2 Suave, sophisticated, debonair, ugly as sin.
 3 Suave, sophisticated, debonair, ugly as sin.

Jumpin' Jack Flash
 1 Eww, there's that cat I ran over earlier on your head...
 2 Attack of the Paper Shredder
 3 What's worse - the glasses or the fact that she is playing with a Pokey doll?

Just Shoot Me - Seasons 1 & 2
 1 "I'd like to thank the Academy."
 2 The Blushing gang
 3 Smile Maya!
 4 Blush life
 5 Just shooting
 6 His Royal Finchness, the munchkin King

Keeping Up Appearances - The C...
 1 The Bouquet residence, the lady of the house speaking!
 2 Mind that pedestiran dear!

Kenny Rogers - Live By Request dts
 1 Oh my God!

Kill Bill - Vol. 1 dts
 1 So many anonymous henchmen, so little time...
 2 Welcome to the snow dome...
 3 Sigh. You just can't steal classy wheels these days...
 4 Lucy Liu's looking a little drawn...
 5 Ooh, it's Matron Conniving-Bitch. Sneak, sneak...

Knight Rider - Season 1
 1 Michael Knight - Moonwalker!
 2 Darryl Sommers impersonator?
 3 A Shady Character
 4 K.I.T.T. - Knight Industries Two Thousand
 5 K.I.T.T. + K.A.R.R. = C.H.I.C.K.E.N.

Kolya
 1 Ventriloquism - the forgotten art.
 2 "On your bike, mate!"

Laputa: Castle in the Sky
 1 A floating princess from the sky? What luck!?
 2 Smile! You're at Mr Smilies!
 3 The rooster of the future.
 4 Argh, always with the flying tentacles!
 5 Ohh... an underground star cave.

Law & Order - Criminal Intent ...
 1 The modern day Sherlock Holmes & Dr Watson
 2 He's thinking..........
 3 Criminal menu

Law & Order - SVU - Season 1
 1 The obligatory team walking shot
 2 Benson & Stabler
 3 SVU menu

Lean On Me
 1 Listen to me when I'm shouting at you!

Lilo & Stitch
 1 Engage!
 2 Blue punch buggy!
 3 All that Stitching is making me atch!
 4 Aloha Lilo & Stitch...

Little Black Book
 1 Our film is just like Working Girl. You wish!
 2 Stacey & Barb open pandora's box
 3 Kibbie Kann Do!
 4 Little Black menu

Living Free
 1 Somebody push me!

Looney Tunes Back in Action
 1 Shh! Don't say the name...
 2 Exterminate or space demodulate?
 3 Hello my baby, hello my darlin'!
 4 Of course you know this means war...
 5 Out to Munch...

Lovely & Amazing
 1 Elizabeth (Emily Mortimer) and Michelle (Catherine Keener) try to make conversation at a Hollywood party.

Madonna - The Girlie Show
 1 A beautiful Sydney Sunset
 2 The menu screen
 3 S&M = Silk masks and microphones.
 4 A concert like no other.

Mafia!
 1 You!!! Be cool!
 2 Trust me, the soothers didn't work.
 3 ...and then you whistle. I call it the pip squeak.
 4 Isn't it adorable. A baby Saddam.
 5 Now that's a spicy meatball.

Maid in Manhattan
 1 Can you see the electricity?
 2 Do you see what I see?
 3 Beware of strange men in elevators...
 4 Mirror, mirror on the wall, are there any features at all?

Mambo Italiano
 1 You're what???????
 2 Doctor.... I keep seeing flowers everywhere.
 3 Oh my god mate, this shirt matches my sisters wallpaper.

Manchester United - Beyond the...
 1 Becks!
 2 Ryan Giggs
 3 Roy Keane

Mask Of Zorro
 1 Don Rafaelo Montero
 2 Don Diego De La Vega
 3 Alejandro Murrieta - Zorro
 4 Antonio with the sleek look.
 5 Elena - Catherine Zeta-Jones

Matthew Bournes Swan Lake
 1 The young prince.
 2 A night on the lake.
 3 The swans come out...
 4 The queen celebrates.

Midnight Express-Anniversary E...
 1 Billy alone in the sanitarium.
 2 Randy Quaid being stabbed in the arse as an act of revenge by a fellow prisoner.
 3 Billy Hayes being arrested after the discovery of hashish strapped to him belly.  The guards believe it may be explosives.

Mighty Joe Young
 1 Relax! Unwind! Go hunting.
 2 The thermometer is cold!!! it's frikkin freezing.
 3 You're right, waxing could get expensive.
 4 a South African beauty.
 5 A North American hooty.

Monk - Season 1
 1 No, I'm not the guy from Men In Black.
 2 No, I'm not the principal from Ferrie Beullers Day Off
 3 No, I'm not afraid of getting a tan.

Monsters, Inc. dts
 1 Do you sell contact lenses?
 2 Get this thing off me...
 3 Oh my, Toy Story 3 on DVD?!

Moonlight Mile
 1 Joe (Jake Gyllenhaal) pauses for thought.
 2 Bertie (Ellen Pompeo) lives up to the US Postal Service's rain, hail or shine policy.
 3 Dinner with Ben and Jojo.
 4 Jake Gyllenhaal and Dustin Hoffman put in an early challenge for the 2003 DVDnet stare-out contest.
 5 Bertie and Joe.

Mortal Kombat Annihilation
 1 It is a time of bad scripts and useless sequels.
 2 Shao Khan with a bad case of skinus-missingus.
 3 Smoke makes an apperance.
 4 Smile, you're on mortal camera.
 5 Motaro a Sagitarius?

Moulin Rouge - SE dts
 1 Lavish sets aplenty
 2 Let's set the scene
 3 Better the Fairy you know!
 4 Ok, now cough.
 5 The bad ass chicks of the Moulin Rouge
 6 The story begins!

Mudvayne - L(ive) D(osage) 50 ...
 1 Scary!

Muppet Treasure Island: SE
 1 She'll be apples...
 2 The rich halfwit son of a shipbuilder consults Mr. Bimbo...
 3 Waldorf and Statler reduced to figureheads...
 4 Captain Smollett: Raging volcano...
 5 Long John Silver and Polly the, erm, lobster...

Music in High Places - Goo Goo... dts
 1 So purrrty
 2 "I thought you were driving?!?"
 3 Music in High Places

Mutiny on the Bounty
 1 "Mr Christian! Why is this man wearing stripes with stripes?"
 2 The crew had resorted to using innovative forms of bait.
 3 Don't you just hate it when you spot someone else wearing the same outfit?

My Big Fat Greek Wedding
 1 Your personal Greek statue.
 2 Ee-yun!!!
 3 You may now kiss the meringue...
 4 My Big Fat Greek Menu.

My Giant
 1 And the Oscar goes to...
 2 What's the big deal? My head is normally this high anyway.
 3 Wow! Now that's tall!

Neighbours - The Music
 1 Who'd have thought she'd become a sex symbol?

Nine Queens
 1 "Listen mate, who are you calling a queen?"
 2 "You'd look like me if you had to read my squashed subtitles this fast."
 3 "Sorry, but I have to return this suit to the Men In Black"
 4 "You posted what with that amount of postage?"

Norah Jones And The Handsome B...
 1 Norah Jones...
 2 and The Handsome Band.
 3 Lost in the moment.
 4 Dolly lends her big set of um...lungs for a tune.

Nothing to Lose
 1 "Now, tell us again how much you liked the movie..."

NYPD Blue - Season 2
 1 David Caruso departs the 15th squad for the last time.
 2 Jimmy Smits makes his debut.

Ocean's Twelve
 1 We're getting paid how much?
 2 *Sigh* They're called Boobs Andy!
 3 Better out than in I say!
 4 Any room for me in this flick?

Oklahoma!
 1 Where the wind comes sweepin' down the plain.
 2 Why I do declare you have the shadow of a prop guy on your dress!

Once Upon A Time In China - Sp...
 1 The Sword of Death!
 2 Jet Li going for his Hunter S. Thompson look.
 3 Looks like they've employed Jesus as stunt co-ordinator.
 4 Those crazy Americans!

One Hour Photo (Rental)
 1 A bad day in photoland.

One Perfect Day
 1 One Perfect DVD Menu
 2 You spin me right round...
 3 "All you have to do is listen."
 4 C'mon, up the anti... make it a... *gulp*... TOUCHDOWN!
 5 Leeanna Walsman looks terrified as she realises that 'Tidy' actually stood for 'Tiny'...

Only Fools and Horses - The Co...
 1 "It'll ride up with wear."
 2 Another action-packed Saturday night!

Out of Reach
 1 Cough please
 2 Passing out of the only defence against this movie
 3 Shoot me...please
 4 Is it Art?
 5 Finally, I'm out of this movie
 6 The props department ran out of black jackets.

Party Mix
 1 Dazza is a spunk rat!
 2 Yes, it's that bloody song again...

Patch Adams - CE
 1 Patch comes to a patient as an angel
 2 Patch and his love interest
 3 The Spaghetti pool.

Paul Simon - Graceland
 1 Chevy Chase in his younger days.
 2 Paul Simon, once married to Carrie Fisher.
 3 I once caught a fish this big.
 4 Paul Simon fiddling with his mixer.

Pet Shop Boys - Pop Art
 1 West End Boys, or How To Be Inconspicuous At A Railway Station
 2 One of the pop art menus
 3 You'd be grumpy too if you were covered in 3D spikes...
 4 Sir Ian "Gandalf" McKellen in one of his great roles...

Petula Clark - This is My Song
 1 Hey, don't laugh - Christmas cracker dresses are coming back...

Pink Floyd - Live at Pompeii: ...
 1 Who's Floyd? And why is he pink? Oh, pink pink.
 2 Whaoh, I got this..like..light thing growing outta my head! Good shit man!
 3 Floyd test the Pompeii sewage system together.

Pirates of the Caribbean - CE dts
 1 I didn't buy any blood oranges?!?
 2 Keira sees Johnny's pay cheque...
 3 Hmmm, is this Edina or Patsy?
 4 The downside of eating disorders...
 5 Disc 1 in its anamorphically enhanced goodness...

Planet of the Apes: 35th Anniv... dts
 1 "Who left the bloody taps on?"
 2 The oldest site gag in the book.
 3 "I have a note from my Mum."

Please Teacher! Volume 1 - Hot...
 1 Yes, I'm the awkward one.
 2 Yes. It's that kinda show...
 3 Sailors. They've got one in every port.
 4 The Japanese love their baths..

Point Break (Magna) dts
 1 "Look, half of my Tank Girl costume is here already..."
 2 The birth of The Matrix - version 1.0
 3 "Look, I'm so talented and can pull my "Speed" face on cue!"
 4 I'm gonna break this effing remote in a minute...

Porridge - Series Three
 1 "Balls!"
 2 Two nuts and a screw?

Powder
 1 "C'mere boy! I need a cue ball for mah pool table!"
 2 Powder suffered from severe static electricity when he wore gumboots.
 3 Jeff Goldblum is a goose.

Pretty Woman: SE
 1 "So what did happen with those gerbils?"
 2 SNAP!
 3 "This, ma'am, is called c-u-t-l-e-r-y"
 4 "I feel pretty... Oh so pretty"

Princess Mononoke
 1 Ashitaka: On a Mission from God
 2 The Land of Mist and Fog
 3 Elk and Tree Spirit, forever united.
 4 Tree Spirit from the East
 5 The Princess of Wolves is not happy...
 6 O radiant Deer God, grant me but one wish?

Psycho - CE
 1 Look into the mind of Norman Bates
 2 The House of Horrors
 3 William H. Macy embarks on his last investigation
 4 A cold and chilling murder
 5 Norman Bates keeps an eye on things.

Pulp Fiction
 1 What's in a suitcase?
 2 I will strike down upon thee...
 3 Mia Wallace at the Jack Rabbit slims

Punch-Drunk Love
 1 Lena (Emily Watson) and Barry (Adam Sandler) connect.
 2 Barry goes shopping.
 3 Barry and Lena narrowly avoid getting hit by a Blu-Ray laser prototype.
 4 Don't make him angry. You wouldn't like him when he's angry.
 5 This is what heaven looks like to frozen-meal-in-a-box fans.
 6 The opening credits - at the end of the film.

Quantum Leap - Season 1
 1 Leaping menu
 2 Guys, it's always important to protect yourself when time traveling.
 3 Sam & Al
 4 The time traveling lone ranger in his white bodysuit
 5 I'm in a real identity crisis here, Al!

R&B Never Looked So Good
 1 Everybody spin!

Rage - The Video Link
 1 Raging!

Raiders of the Lost Ark
 1 Jones. Indiana Jones.
 2 Oh no! It's the world's biggest Malteser!
 3 Why is it it so?
 4 Crack that whip...
 5 It's only a model...
 6 Ooh, it's a Pet Shop Boys video clip!

Red Hot Chili Peppers - Live a... dts
 1 We said it looks like you could could do with a good feed!

Requiem for a Dream
 1 hoochimama
 2 preparing for the Hulk.
 3 when the air conditioner fails, use the fridge.
 4 "This human fly thing is making my head spin"

Resident Evil 2 - Apocalypse
 1 Mmmmmmm, Milla!!!
 2 Well! colour me tickled pink.
 3 Let's see if he can worm his way out of this one.
 4 The Toxic Avenger makes a cameo appearance.
 5 Leelo Dallas multi-scars.
 6 I am not a terrorist.

Richie Benaud's Greatest XI
 1 What do you mean no Jonesy!?!
 2 Even Jonesy can't believe it
 3 Even Jonesy can't believe it
 4 Jonesy waits outside the studio for the big announcement - it never came.
 5 Even Jonesy can't believe it!

Ring 0 - Birthday
 1 FLASHDANCE! Everyone wants to Flashdance! I can't stand it anymore!
 2 They simply couldn't stand the thought of another Ray Martin Special.

Rocky
 1 Rocky gets a once in a lifetime offer
 2 The training begins
 3 Rocky goes the distance.

Ronin
 1 Robert De Niro prepares for the ambush
 2 Jean Reno as cool as ever.

Rove '99
 1 The gang.
 2 Awwwww puppy breathe.

S1m0ne dts
 1 "Viktor, THIS is the corner of the frame when we work in Panavision, okay?"
 2 The computer-generated Simone gives "Blue Screen Of Death" a whole new meaning.
 3 I Am Pig wows the critics at the premiere.
 4 Coming this summer: "F0nz1e"

Samsara
 1 Brush away the anger...
 2 Like a postcard come to life...
 3 A powerful and poised Pema
 4 The entrance to a new and different world

Saw
 1 Don't look at me I didn't do it
 2 Damn! How can I get this onto my Ipod?
 3 This is Big Brother...
 4 Smile for the little birdy
 5 Phantom of the opera this isn't!

Secretary
 1 "Damn, that cardboard cutout of Mr Grey is creeping me out..."
 2 "And next, we'll do the ears..."
 3 "I'm Sophie Ellis-Bextor... err, I mean, I'm your secretary!"
 4 "This one time, when I had the Invisible Woman for a secretary..."
 5 Situation vacant.

Seven - SE dts
 1 Ultra Violet and Ultra Violent
 2 The killer strikes.
 3 Avon calling.
 4 Watching the detectives.
 5 I could have sworn I dropped it here.
 6 Three down, Four to go.

Sex With Strangers (Rental)
 1 Couple number one.
 2 Dressed for success.
 3 Prowling the chat rooms for more swingers.

Shaun Of The Dead
 1 Corrr, that's one juicy blister!
 2 Would you like flies with that?!